It’s noon on a Wednesday and Scott Peterson already has beer on the mind.

What could’ve been a lifelong haunting moment for most turned out to be an epiphany for Josh Merrell.

“I farted in front of my fourth-grade class. The teacher asked who did it and instead of sheepishly hiding at my desk, I raised my hand,” he said. “The room erupted with laughter; I even made a few friends. That’s when I got a taste for comedy, although I took the fart bit out of my routine just recently.”

The Maggie Valley Board of Aldermen is at an impasse.

Town leaders met Monday in hopes of appointing someone to fill an open seat on the board, which was vacated last month by an alderman who moved away. But, the four remaining board members could not agree on a replacement, meaning the controversy-laden process will continue for at least another three weeks.

As Lake Junaluska residents chart a future course for their community, two options now remain on the table: become its own town or merge with the town of Waynesville.

For decades, Lake Junaluska has operated as a well-oiled homeowners association — with its own security force, trash pick-up, water and sewer service and other amenities normally only found in actual towns.

It’s a long wait for residents of Nantahala in Macon County when they dial the Sheriff’s Office.

Deputy response time to the small community of Nantahala from the sheriff’s office in Franklin can take up to 30 minutes, which is why Sheriff Robbie Holland wants to expand his force and station someone in Nantahala fulltime, but that too has been a long time coming.

Will it be a bomb, an oil shortage, energy grid damage or an electromagnetic pulse that renders America’s modern modes of transportation useless?

Or will it be the collapse of modern society or simply the collapse of your bank account under the pressure of mounting fuel costs that removes the option of driving a car from the transportation equation?

As the first chunk of bread was tossed in the air, a swarm of ducks and geese at Lake Junaluska swiftly waddled toward the source of the handout, a chorus of quacks and honks rising up from the flurry of feathers.

Haywood County is making a few hundred dollars a month converting methane gas emanating from the old county landfill on Francis Farm into electricity, and reselling it over the power grid.

“It has been a long process, but we are out there putting power back on the grid,” said David Francis, the Haywood County tax administrator and solid waste committee member, at a meeting of the county Board of Commissioners this week.

The simple task of replacing an empty seat on the Maggie Valley Board of Aldermen has turned into a process rife with finger pointing and faultfinding after the board failed to lay out a clear process for how the new alderman would be chosen.

Just two weeks ago, longtime alderman and Maggie resident Phil Aldridge resigned before moving back to his hometown in Alabama to get married, leaving it up to the four remaining board members to name his replacement.

A row of four stately evergreens that anchored the front of Waynesville Middle School — providing both shade and a meeting hub on campus — were cut down two weeks ago to the chagrin of students and teachers.